Sunday, September 03, 2006

Love Dissolves Grudges

During an exchange I was having with a friend at a now defunct forum, I wrote:

"In the dream, Paddy, everyone has a grudge against everyone else."
A few hours later on the bus home, two young women caught my attention. They were discussing relationships, music and socialising. I made out they were undergraduate students. One said she was hoping to be a music journalist. However, these were no ordinary young women - they were "little people"; at least that's how I heard them describe themselves, which I presume is the political correct way of referring to a "dwarf." One talked about how she would love to have kids and has discussed this with a friend but he said he didn't want to bring other "little people" into the world. I got the impression they mostly socialised with other "little people."

Without taking into account the women's appearances, they sounded like most people with their hopes, dreams and beliefs. They were even speaking disparagingly about someone else, as people do. You know, little people belittling other little people.

It's interesting that no matter what social group people find themselves in the human dream, everyone dumps on every one else.

In the human dream there are many different identities with their own grudges. Men against women; men against men; women against women; family member against family member; family against family; adults against kids; kids against kids; friend against friend; black against white; white against white; black against black; heterosexuals against heterosexuals; heterosexuals against gays and lesbians; gays against lesbians; gays against gays; lesbians against lesbians; able-bodied against disabled; working class against working class; working class against middle class; middle class against middle class; middle class against upper class; educated against uneducated; professional against unemployed; religion against religion; philosophical belief against philosophical belief; police against state; politicians against leaders; politicians against politicians; politicians against citizens; media against celebrities; media against metrosexuals; media against truth; culture against culture; nation against nation; man against animals; man against nature; man against self; and so it goes on.

Speaking of which, while I was studying Women Studies at university, the introductory module was divided into 10 topics where each topic focused on a strand of feminism such as Liberal Feminism and Radical Feminism. The last topic about Black Feminism turned everything on its head. Black feminists argued that they faced a dilemma: should they take a stand against ALL men to fight sexism; or should they stand with black men and fight against racism? Other black feminists maintained there was racism within Feminism: black feminist contributions were either being marginalised or ignored.

Poor white feminist students! There they were thinking they'd got Feminism sorted only to realise that Feminism is a lot more complicated than they realised. In other words, Feminism is another example of the human dream where one group has a grudge against another.

So how do you get out of the dream of having a grudge against another?

You could try and change the dream. Little people could grow taller and look like "normal" people. There may even be medical techniques available to extend people's limbs. Otherwise, you could pray for a miracle. I've heard testimonies about people whose limbs have grown. Somehow I don't believe fixing the dream will end grudges. If you've still got the mentality of inferiority or superiority, you're bound to dream up something else to have a grudge about.

I would say go beyond the dream to where we are all one. It is Love that unifies us. For example, one of the "little people" on the bus said her favourite singer was Björk (pronounced Byok). I happen to love Björk whose songs are very unique. Björk also comes across as someone who is being true to herself. I started humming the chorus to a Björk track called "Venus as a Boy."

He believes in beauty
He's venus as a boy
I was still humming the song when I got off the bus. I'm humming it now.

Beyond all appearances and identities we are all the one Love.

Love dissolves all grudges.


Related article: Breaking the Cycle: Being Myself

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