Thursday, October 26, 2006

Boundlessness

Boundlessness is a state of being where your sense of self has no boundaries.

While I appear to have my own body that distinguishes me as separate from another, that is not the full story. If I think of my identity purely from this standpoint then I am limiting myself. I have to go beyond the form to discover my infinite potential which is boundless love.

Recently on the bus I heard this man speaking to his son (or daughter) on his mobile phone. He was asking him what he'd been up to and when he could see him. He also asked the child about the baby. I wondered if this meant the man wasn’t living with the children’s mother. Instead of dreaming up stories about him I asked him outright.

"Was that your son or daughter?"
"It was my daughter."
"How old is she?"
"She's three. I like calling her because by the time I get home she's usually in bed."
"I see."
"I love her so much and I really miss not seeing her," he said.
"That's lovely. You mentioned something about a baby?"
"Yes, he's only 6 months old."
"Sounds like you're really enjoying being a dad," I said.
"Yes, I am," he grinned. "What about you, have you got any kids?"
"No."
"Don't you want any?"
"It's not really my path."
"I know what you mean. Being a parent is a huge responsibility and it is not for everyone. Sometimes I feel sad when I am not home in time to spend time with my daughter."
"Well it's been nice talking to you," I said as we approached the last stop."

A few days later I was speaking to a friend and I told her about this man who loved his kids. My friend was surprised I had not only eavesdropped his conversation, I had got him to open up to me about his family situation. I thought it was the most natural thing to do.

The other day at a bookshop I heard a young man speaking on his mobile with a friend or so I presumed. He sounded American. At first he was happy sharing what he'd been up to in London. Then the tone of his voice changed as if he was guarded. He told his friend he was trying to stay in his "core" and didn't appreciate his friend's advice. He said the reason why they usually fall out is because his friend is always trying to tell him how he should live his life. He said he couldn't take his friend's advice seriously because he couldn’t see any evidence of her applying the same advice to her life situation. The man said he had to go and hung up. I wondered if he had been speaking to his girlfriend.

When he'd finished I went back to the book I was browsing. On the next page the reader was talking about how important it is to be true to yourself and stay in your "core" no matter what. People mean well when they give advice but only you know what's the right thing for you. You have to trust in the voice within you.

I was now facing a dilemma. I wanted to share this paragraph with the young man but if I did it would confirm I'd been eavesdropping his conversation. What to do? I decided to go for it. I told him I was a writer and I usually listen to snippets of people's conversation as I found them interesting. I told him I'd just come across a paragraph that mirrored his conversation.

When he'd finished reading the paragraph, he said "I can relate to this. My mother is always trying to tell me what to do. She seems stuck in a particular way of seeing me and can't see that I've grown and quite capable of following my own guide."
"I know exactly what you mean," I smiled. "Your mother means well, they all do."
"Thanks for sharing this," he said.
"No problem."

At the bus stop the other day, I met this elderly lady who was carrying a suitcase. I pointed out to her that her suitcase was open. She thanked me. I asked her where she was going and she said Knightsbridge. She asked me what bus she could take. I told her she needed to get two buses. She said she was doing her family tree and had discovered some connections to a famous company. When our bus arrived we sat in separate seats. I picked up a newspaper and had a good read. Later I realised we were both travelling on the same route so I sat next to her. She resumed her story about what she'd discovered in her research. Much of what she was saying didn't make much sense to me as it had a lot to do with family feuds over inheritance. When we got off the bus and got on the next one, she continued telling me about her family situation. She divorced her husband and had to raise three sons on her own. She said it was hard but she was very determined. She fought for her kids to have scholarships to attend public school, which in the UK is a a fee charging independent secondary school. Now her grown up sons are doing very well, one is even a millionaire. Just before she got off she said it was nice speaking to me. It would appear my friend simply needed someone to listen to her and that is what I did.

When you know your nature is boundless it's quite natural for you to speak to someone beside you; after all, that person is you. You may even find that the one sitting beside you has the very answer you've been seeking or you have something that person needs at that moment.

There are no boundaries.

All is Love.

Enocia

Related article: There are No Doors





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